Happy Birthday, Granny!

Granny with my own Cinco de Mayo baby -- June 2009

This post has been a long time coming...I've thought of it often, not sure where to start...only confident in the inadequacy of my words. You see...Granny, my maternal grandmother, passed away on February 20. She had been dealing with various health challenges for over a year, with them worsening this past January. The days that followed that Saturday were filled with love for her, gladness that she was reunited with my grandpa who had left this earth over 21 years ago, peace that she was meeting Jesus face-to-face and sadness over saying our good-byes. It was therapeutic to revisit memories with cousins as we sorted through Granny's various treasures that she had kept for so long. It was heartwarming to hear the pastor, who was to conduct the memorial service, suggest that he center his words on the Excellent Wife...as described in Proverbs 31.

She has left such a mark on my life...several marks even. She grew up with sisters so she could always empathize when my sister and I were having...hmmm...what's the word I'm looking for?..."difficulties" with one another. She loved her husband and was a great example to me of what a loving wife should be. She raised six children and was always willing to share her own parenting experiences and laugh at the antics of her grandchildren and great-grandchildren. The pastor described her as a homemaker in the truest sense of the word...someone who MADE a home that we all looked forward to visiting. She loved her family.

My sister and I made the trip to visit with her a week before she passed. What a worthwhile journey! We were thrilled that she recognized us and was so willing to chat. She would stare into our eyes and hold hands as we enjoyed our time together. At one point in the visit, her living room was filling up with several family members. I stepped into her room where she was resting and commented on how noisy her family was. She responded that "it's the best kind of noise". She loved her family. And what a testament to her and my grandpa that there have never been any chasms in the relationships amongst her family.

When my mom asked if there was any specific belongings of my grandma that I would want. I instantly thought of two of her bowls. I can still picture them on the table...filled with gravy or fried potatoes or banana pudding. These bowls represented to me what she provided for her family...a home in which to be nourished literally and figuratively. I am also blessed to have in my possession a Bible...given to my grandparents in 1960 by my mom. What a treasure to remind me of the three people who have played such important roles in my own walk of faith!

Additionally, I took possession of many items that I had given to my grandparents over the years. You will see in the picture the potholders that I made on my little plastic loom...doilies bearing my embroidery and my mom's crocheting handiwork...a painting that I believe I did during girl scouts. I have letters that I sent, while in elementary school, to my grandparents and an anxious letter I wrote to them the week before I left for college. I am so thankful that I gave them and so thankful that she saved them.

As I wrap this up, I must confess that I do not believe that this begins to be worthy of her and all that she has meant to me. As soon as it is published, I will have regrets of other memories and thoughts not shared. Not a day will go by that I won't be reminded of her. But I have joy...joy that she is at peace and in heaven...joy that I will see her again in heaven someday. And I have responsibility...the responsibility of being worthy of her and her legacy...the responsibility of sharing her character with my own daughters as they grow up to be women of faith, wives and mothers. Granny was certainly a cathedral builder in my life and many others. And her influence will be felt for years to come.

Happy Birthday, Granny...I love you...I miss you.

You can read more about my grandma here. This is the post in which I introduced her to you last summer.

You can also read my sister's post about my grandma here. Yes...I was (and still am) quite intimidated that she wrote such a beautiful tribute...in the airport...on the way home back in February.

Kid Art

The four-year-old painted this picture recently during a homeschoolers' class on the Impressionists taught at our local art museum. She created this using watercolors and "stamping" the paint using pieces of styrofoam. She has titled it "Spring"...quite appropriate with the tree...flowers and grass...and the butterflies.

Such a Nice Thing to Hear

The note on my Facebook "wall" said

I heard this said about you today, "She has such a heart for the Lord." and thought that you would love to know! Thanks for ALL you do.

Such a nice thing to hear about yourself. It started an interesting mix of thoughts and feelings for me as I considered it.

First of all, since we are called to be a light in the world, witnessing to others by putting our faith into action...doesn't it feel great when someone notices it? I considered all my blessings that make it so easy to have "a heart for the Lord"... a relationship with God because of the sufferings of Jesus, married to my own personal superhero, the blessing of being the mom to three beautiful girls, the world's best parents/sister/extended family (in-laws included), wonderful friends, the unearned privilege of being born in the best country in the world...and on and on and on.

But then I start analyzing...considering the comment made, am I joyful because I brought glory to God or prideful because I brought glory to myself? The analysis continues...I know what my actions and thoughts were for the entire day...am I worthy of such a comment? I know that many (if not most) of my actions or thoughts on that particular day, and even this morning, were not for the Lord.

One of the weapons that Satan will use to weaken our faith and our relationship with God is doubt. While it is true that we, as sinners, are unworthy of the precious gift of salvation, that gift was still freely given. And I have to work at focusing on the love God has for me, to make such a gift available. I can't focus on why God shouldn't love me, but do my darnedest to be worthy of His love for me...a love so strong and deep that He planned for and allowed the sacrifice of His Son for me.

And when someone gives me a little "hat tip" regarding my faith in action, maybe that's God's way of letting me know that I'm on the right track and I'm growing where I've been planted. Because it is my heart's prayer that others see less of me and more of Jesus in all I do...that I can complete the work that God has given me so that, at that appointed time, when I enter into Heaven's gates, I hear "Well done, thy good and faithful servant" (Matthew 25:21).

Other verses to consider ~ Romans 5:8, Romans 6:23, Ephesians 2:8-9

Slugbug Prayers

Allow me to begin by confessing that I have not YET mastered the discipline of getting up early every morning for some quality quiet time with my Bible...and a thorough prayer session. I realize that confessing the weakness is the first step towards overcoming it...please pray for me!

With that said, you can understand that I need as much help as possible to make the most of the power of prayer. So I have developed/copied/stolen various triggers and routines that will bring me into a prayerful moment. For example, I participate in a long distance slugbug competition with my sister in California and my cousin in Arkansas (and, now my mom...wherever she may be at any given time). When any of us sees a Volkswagon Beetle, we text the others, accumulating points for the day (no slugging...just the prize of daily victory). There are extra points for convertibles and vintage models (we call them "old school"). This may seem silly to some, but I don't care. What this does is keep us connected on a daily basis. And, whether I see a slugbug and text them, or I receive a message from one of them on a sighting...that triggers me to say a prayer of thanks for these special ladies...perhaps petitioning God on their behalf regarding something going on in their life...asking for blessing on them and their loved ones. This children's game reminds me to pray for them.

And I have other similar triggers in my daily life....while folding laundry, pray for each garment's owner, making each prayer specific because there will probably be more than one prayer said for each person...pictures and mementos around my home remind me to pray for various family members and friends...see a news story or article, pray for those involved and that God's will be done...and, when I lay down to sleep, to quiet my brain from the day's activities and tomorrow's to-do list, I pray specifically over my husband and my children, and all that is going on in their lives. It's a chance for me to give thanks for all the blessings in my life and to hand over any burdens to Him who loved me so much that He gave His only Son so that I may believe and not perish (John 3:16). This allows me to enjoy peaceful rest.

Several years ago, I spent some time in the Bible study by Cynthia Heald titled "Becoming a Woman of Prayer" (you can order it here). I learned volumes about how God is listening...how He wants us to be persistent...that we can pray for anything. And I drew comfort from knowing that the Holy Spirit will lift up the prayers we really need when we may not know what to pray for. Prayer has given me comfort when moments of worry and doubt may be sneaking up on me. And I've seen the results of prayer in my life...in the big life issues and the daily challenges that a stay-at-home homeschooling mom can face. I am thankful that Jesus tore the veil separating me from God...through dying for my sinfulness...so that I can approach the throne of the Holy Father myself and build a relationship.

So, I recommend that you work on understanding the power of prayer. Develop your prayer habits. You will come to develop a peace that will help you manage life through any circumstance.

April Showers...

...Will bring May flowers.

On a Rainy April Day...

...This is my Headband of Optimism.

No comments, please, regarding the cleanliness of my Headband of Optimism. Remember...I have children.

Spring is...

...springing forth! God is GREAT!